...in a News Roundup world first, an actual piece of helpful news (ignore the silly Brit spelling).
...some of which have been used for good (video):
...and some not-so good:
...could hardly get worse… oh wait, this just in:
...but it does get a little better:
...awwww:
Time for some International News:
...probably the only way one can get through the day Down Under.
…
...I had no idea you could do the race in a Porsche — hell, even I could do that.
...hmmm, maybe humans are becoming smarter.
...there you go, bringing science into religion again.
In Food News:
...called the “Lizzo Meal”.
...so on yer next trip Over There, don’t be surprised to see Heinz cans hanging on trees.
...you had me at “Victoria sponge cake”. Now I have to find one, and eat it.
Finally, our Celebrity News:
...you mean he learned how to do something every single Western woman does every morning of her life? Stop the presses.
And from the not-so-top-secret files of INSIGNIFICA:
…
...other than having a neon sign on her forehead reading “I prefer pussy”, I can’t see how much more she can do to tell you that she’s a lesbo.
And in Paige Three News:
Malfunction, provocative action or delightful accident? I report, you decide.
The “reporter” responsible for the “Ooh, Brits can grow beans now!” idiocy knows naught of the Medieval Warm Period (also called the Medieval Optimum, hmm, I wonder why it was optimal). Back then, the Brits grew better wine grapes than France, and where does he/she/it think the nursery rhyme, “Oats, peas, beans, and barley grow” came from. They aren’t talking green beans.
Historical illiterates, grrrrr…..