5 Worst (Other) People To Think Of While Having Sex

Everyone’s been there (don’t even think of denying it):  you’re making the beast-with-two-backs with your honey and unbidden, someone else pops into your mind.  Here are the five worst / most inappropriate of such, ranked as always in ascending order of foulness:

For the ladies:

  • the Dalai Lama
  • Alan Alda
  • Woody Allen
  • Bill or  Hillary Clinton (tie)
  • Bruce Jenner

And for the guys:

  • anyone from Jersey Shores (the TV show or  the place itself)
  • Milo Yannopoulos
  • your ten-year-old stepdaughter
  • Maxine Waters
  • Caitlyn Jenner

Your suggestions in Comments… when you’ve stopped throwing up, that is.


  1. The possibilities are endless and scary.
    Nancy Pelosi
    Roseanne Barr
    Any of the Communist harpys on The View
    Ellen Degenerate – yeah I know she goes the other way but I think that the plumbing might be there. Never know until you check out the goods and then some things can’t be unseen.

  2. For the men:

    Your mother.
    Your lover’s mother.
    Hillary Clinton.
    Bill Clinton.
    Chelsea Clinton.
    Your dog.

    For he ladies:

    Ronald McDonald.
    Your father.
    Your gynecologist.
    Your lover’s dog.
    Gilbert Gottfried.

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