Well, That Sucks

Some smart guy at RedState gets all lawyerly on us, and explains why we won’t see the entire Obama crime family administration dangling from the gibbet anytime soon:

We can all agree that the IC and FBI certainly abused their power, but there is no crime listed in the US Code called “abuse of power.”
Although I would like to see them “perp walked” in handcuffs and leg irons in orange jumpsuits and unshaven faces, I don’t think it is in the cards or the law books. It is a shame because we all know they did wrong. The big question is what technically it was they did wrong that would stand up in a court of law.

Reading his whole article, I reluctantly have to agree with him.

Worse yet, I read this after I’d finished my breakfast pint of gin, and I have a cast-iron rule not to have another drink until after noon.

So now, if you’ll excuse me, it’s time to clean a few of my guns.

The Real Redress

So Gen. Michael Flynn has had the nonsensical case against him dropped because the lying cocksuckers at the FBI tried to frame and railroad him with a bullshit charge, and the new heads at the DOJ decided to give up a lost cause.  (Side note:  it’s now time to remove the criminality of lying to a federal agent, or else extend the same criminality and punishments to the federal agent lying to you.)

The problem is that an innocent man has been bankrupted trying to defend himself against this blatant banana-republic connivance, and still stands under a cloud for no good reason, and the question remains:  how do we compensate Flynn for the harm to his reputation and for his financial harm?  There could be a lawsuit filed, but we all know that’s utter bullshit, he’ll get (if anything) pennies to the dollar and his lawyers will go away rich.  Trump’s muttering about a heavy price, but color me dubious.

Nor, I think, will James Comey, Strzok and their little band of merry men suffer any real distress for their own lawlessness — and if you think they will, I have a cute little bridge in Manhattan to sell you.  Actually, I’d rather sell you this.

I think POTUS should appoint Michael Flynn as head of the FBI, effective immediately.  And I want POTUS to tell Congress to appropriate a “director’s signing bonus” for Flynn equal to the amount he lost while struggling to defend himself against these sniveling assholes.

And Flynn should get a real fire-breathing set of deputies and assistants extending down the top four layers of FBI management across all their divisions, so that they can start a serious and thorough investigation into not just what happened to Flynn, but to everyone subjected to the same treatment over the past… say, twelve years.

Some good things would come of this.

For one thing, there will be mass resignations at the FBI as the rats will scatter to save their own skins, which is a good thing.  The fewer of these vermin in the once-proud agency, the better.

The next good thing is that the investigations I’ve suggested will pretty much paralyze the FBI for a good couple years, tying them up with endless paperwork and such, with all sorts of people looking over their shoulders, second-guessing themselves and generally being too frightened to go to the can without three levels of authorization.  The busier they are with this, the less time they’d have to perpetrate similar mischief on others.

The third thing, and the best of the lot, is an old-fashioned word:  revenge.  I want Flynn to flay these assholes from stem to stern, laying about him with vim and vigor, fucking up their lives as much as they fucked with his — just because he can.

And POTUS should announce that as a matter of policy, Flynn’s enemies shouldn’t bother filing lawsuits against his actions because he’ll just issue pardon after pardon, basically as redress for Flynn’s hardships suffered these past three or so years.

I’m looking for some Old Testament-style retribution here, because reasons.

Feel free to argue with me, but I have to tell you, you’d better be good because I’m in a particularly vengeful mood at the moment.  However, if you have ideas to make things even  worse for these FBI pricks, legally speaking, I’m all ears.

Inexplicable

Certain things in life cannot be explained, e.g.:

…and this:

…how this doofus ever became famous:

…and why people continue to believe that government-made levees won’t fail:

But in that set of of inexplicable things, this headline tops all of them:

Here’s what I don’t understand:  how the hell did this story ever get out?

Did the hairdresser brag about her feat on Faecesbook?  Were the hairdresser’s customers alerted to this man’s predicament by his muffled screams, and called the cops?

OR:  did this helpless victim get free (either by being released by his captor, or somehow breaking free by his own efforts)… and then complain about it to the cops?  What kind of man would do that?

And (if the newspaper account of this escapade is to be believed) even as the former were the case, why did the cops take him seriously?

Now if the hairdresser looked like this, then maybe I could understand it better.

…but once again, if the article is to be believed, she wasn’t that bad-looking (with the “Russian caveat”* in effect).

So… did this helpless sex slave think he was going to get his own back on her (so to speak) by shopping her to the cops?  If so, that worked out really  well for him, as he was tossed into jail for the action which got him into this predicament in the first place, and where he was likely to be raped again, only by men and without the after-sex reward of food, money and a pair of jeans.

Like I said:  inexplicable.


*the Russian caveat:  not all young Russian women look like worn-out Moscow street prostitutes, but it’s the safe way to bet.

News Roundup

News snippets, snippy comments.

1) Aggrieved former employee shoots people in brewerysee, that’s your “cultural appropriation” right there:  the brother used a (White man’s) gun and not a culturally-appropriate machete.  Couple of ancillary notes:  he didn’t use a black rifle, or else that would be all over the news, you betcha;  and he wasn’t allowed to own a gun because of a previous felony — not that this stopped him, of course, nor will you hear about this little factoid in the news.

2) China blames racism for corona virus fearsanything to deflect attention from the fact that these evil fucks were playing with this shit in a government laboratory as part of bio-warfare weapons development, and it got out by accident.  Just for that, I hope that millions of Chinese die from it, and maybe they’ll be dissuaded from these reindeer games in future.

3) China sends ducks to Muslim Pakistan to fight locust swarmsI suppose it would be churlish to suggest that the Pakis test the ducks for the corona virus.

4) Chinese city caught lying about corona virus statswait… Commies lie?  Does Bernie know about this?

5) Huge menu changesprobably a little late for that, but whateverSan Francisco’s and New York’s Chinatown hardest hit.

That’s enough virus nonsense.  In other news:

6) Most women only tolerate sexas any man over the age of 30 knows well.

7) Democrat candidates say all sorts of things [no links, why bother] — don’t care.  It’s either a pack of lies or else Communist policy [some overlap].

Finally, Headline Of The Week:

Nicolas Cage arrives in NYC carrying stuffed beluga and holding hands with mystery ‘girlfriend’… after taking her to visit his OWN TOMB in New Orleans

…because that’s how Nick Cage rolls, man.