New Bogeymen Required

Oy.  Here’s one to make us all do a desk faceplant:

While an increase in cancer risk has long been linked to smoking, red meat, environmental factors such as pollution and second hand smoke, and lifestyle habits like booze intake and weight, doctors are now looking at ultra processed foods, oral sex and vaping as some of the possible causes.

Any bets as to whether they’ll find what they’re looking for?

Of course they will, because doctors are busybody killjoys who just love telling people how to run their own lives.

Oh, and let’s not forget:

6 comments

  1. George Carlin (peace be upon him) had a bit decades ago where a news announcer reports that “doctors warn that saliva, when taken in small amounts over a long period of time, causes cancer”. Personally, if everything causes cancer then I see no need to worry about any of the warnings; it’s gonna get me eventually so why fight it?

    1. There are some things that are really dangerous and you ought to be aware of, although free to take the risk if you want. E.g., a crumbling hiking path above the caldera of an active volcano ought to have a warning sign. But the continuous warnings about _everything_ mean that everyone ignores warnings. There are labels on my ladder warning that one might fall off, and on my chainsaw warning of accidental dismemberment, but also on my air fryer warning that one might burn a finger a little if one acts very, very stupidly.

      I’m waiting for gun manufacturers to have to put a large “This end towards target” sign on a small pistol. You’ll have to remove the sign to even holster the pistol, and the lawyers will run up millions in fees arguing about whether doing that means you assumed the risk of negligent discharges – which should have been the legal standard anyway whenever anyone picks up a gun.

  2. in a few months these studies will be debunked by other studies which in turn will be debunked later on. It reminds me of the opening of Monty Python’s Holy Grail movie where people who wrecked the opening have been sacked, then the people who sacked the first group have been sacked etc etc.

    eat and drink what you like. If you want to live a little longer then do it in moderation but that’s no fun

  3. ultraprocessed foods are very bad for the body.
    Meat is not.

    The “studies” that “showed” meat causes cancer were extremely questionable and funded (surprise surprise) by veganist and 7th day adventist (there is a lot of overlap) groups.

    Vaping I wouldn’t be surprised has a cancer risk, the junk that goes into those liquids and equipment is completely unregulated and can’t be good for you, plus most idiots set the temperatures way too high, causing burns in their lungs (and metal and plastic burn residue as well).

    Sex causing cancer? Same as the meat thing, religious nutcases wanting to have another scare to keep people chaste and going to church several times a week (and don’t forget to fill those donation boxes, people, without it you’re going to hell).

    1. The “red meat causes cancer” studies also confused chunks of meat carved off a cow and simply cooked (steaks, roasts, and hamburger) with processed meats cured with chemicals (hot dogs, sausages, etc.). Using the methods of food “scientists”, I could prove that water is poisonous: call an arsenic solution “water” and show lab rats dying of drinking “water”.

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