Accents

The immortal line from the late and much-missed Dennis Farina comes to mind (speaking to some Brits when they throw some unintelligible wordslush at him):

“You guys invented the language;  why don’t you fucking speak it?”

Here’s the explanation of the accents behind the language, the accents ranked, and then an explanation of some of the slang.

In terms of difficulty, there are only three that I find absolutely incomprehensible (in order):  Glasgow, Geordie (Newcastle/Sunderland) and Liverpool.

For the record, when I’m in Britishland I tend to speak Public (a.k.a. private) School Pronunciation — after I’ve been there a while and lost my slightly-Americanized/Texas accent.

But I fail, and while I am well-spoken, my native Johannesburg wins by two lengths.

14 comments

  1. I usually can understand most Brit’s who speak BBC / King’s English, along with the majority of Ozzie’s and New Zealanders. But I have great difficulty understanding what ever language it is that TT Racer Guy Martin speaks.

    …… but it’s American Politicians who can speak for 5 minutes straight without a pause that I find most annoying. I understand the individual words perfectly. It’s the way they are combined and connected in an incomprehensible word salad that I find most infuriating. Some overlap with members of the Female persuasion.

    1. Guy Martin comes from Grimsby (the emphasis being on GRIM). Not even us Brits can decipher that lot, we just nod and smile.

      1. Try drunken Geordies. Or Scots, of almost any geography.

        And they’re ALWAYS drunk.

        1. The thick Brummie accent was a challenge for me. It’s just mumbling to my ear. I always thought Ozzie Osborne slurred his words because of all the drugs, but it turns out, he’s just from Birmingham.

          1. That reminds me of the driver of the tour bus when I did my first trip to Scotland in August of ’02, who was a Brummie.
            I could not decipher whatever he said.
            And Kim, the corollary to that quote from Dennis Farina as Avi if “Yes, London. You know: fish, chips, cup ‘o tea, bad food, worse weather, Mary fucking Poppins… LONDON.”

          2. That reminds me of the driver of the tour bus when I did my first trip to Scotland in August of ’02, who was a Brummie.
            I could not decipher whatever he said.
            And Kim, the corollary to that quote from Dennis Farina as Avi is “Yes, London. You know: fish, chips, cup ‘o tea, bad food, worse weather, Mary fucking Poppins… LONDON.”

  2. Norwegians learn Norwegian, the Greeks can all speak Greek. Arabians learn Arabian with the speed of summer lightning, and Hebrews learn it backwards, which is absolutely frightening.

  3. Understanding Brits isn’t a problem.
    Understanding American blacks is.
    We watched some of the sentencing hearing for Timothy Simkins and between the defense attorney and his mother on the witness stand the poor court reporter had to keep asking them to speak up and speak clearly.

    It reminds me of the movie “Airplane”
    “Pardon me stewardess, but I speak jive.”

    1. I would put them in the same class. Jerold in Clarksons Farm speaks absolute gibberish, the same as gang speak. They would probably be able to converse perfectly well.

    2. We met a retired American black lawyer and his wife, both from Georgia. They were well educated, well spoken and intelligent but it took my western Canadian ears and brain 3 days to understand what they were saying without concentrating hard and/or asking them to repeat themselves.

      Was it a black Georgia accent or just a Georgia accent?

  4. Lived in the UK for almost 9 years while in the USAF. Picked up the phraseology, but never the accent. It’s been 30 years since I’ve been back, but the phrases are still a daily thing with me. I married a Brit in 92, she’s been in the US since 93 and still sounds as Suffolk as the day I met her.

  5. Never had a problem with any Brit (i.e. Irish friend from Liverpool), Aussie, or S’Effrican (friends as well). or Scots (more friends), I have to “bend” the ear a bit for the Scots. But, go to the Bahamas, and try to get that accent – it took me several years and a lot of ear bending!

  6. Not even other Scots can understand Weegie. Of course, dialects like Doric (the local lingo) are a whole ‘nother matter.

    And then there’s Gaelic… The local Gaelic primary school is around the corner and I was told – many moons ago – that most parents will do almost anything to not have their children go there.

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