In any Train Smash Women competition, the race is only for second place if Strine women are included, and this year’s Melbourne Cup was no exception:
As the inimitable Mr. Free Market once put it: “Dear God. No wonder Australian men drink so much.”
No man should. But some do:
Sent to me by Tribe Buddy Mervyn:
Italian – throws the cup, breaks it, and walks away in a fit of rage.
German – tosses out the coffee, carefully washes the cup, sterilizes it and makes a new cup of coffee.
Frenchman – takes out the fly, and drinks the coffee.
Chinese – eats the fly and throws away the coffee.
Russian – drinks the coffee with the fly, since it was extra with no charge.
Israeli – sells the coffee to the Frenchman, sells the fly to the Chinese, sells the cup to the Italian, drinks a cup of tea, and uses the extra money to invent a device that prevents flies from falling into coffee.
Hamas Terrorist – blames the Israeli for the fly falling into his coffee, protests the act of aggression to the UN, takes a loan from the European Union to buy a new cup of coffee, uses the money to purchase explosives and then blows up the coffee house where the Italian, the Frenchman, the Chinese, the German and the Russian are all trying to explain to the Israeli that he should give away his cup of coffee to the Palestinians so there will be peace.
Sounds about right, doesn’t it?
So, a little walk down Memory Lane to start off with:
Speaking of fairy tales, some thoughts on Socialism:
A little foreign humor:
Helpful advice:
And on a personal note:
Which means yet another trip down Mammary Lane:
Too many vowels, too many strange pronunciation rules, too… just too fucking Irish:
I think they just have these names to fuck with ordinary English-speaking people, so that they can mock us for not knowing how to pronounce them. They’re almost as bad as the French.
Wankers.
Here’s Dolly Parton’s:
Before:
After:
