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Tag: Humor
Stuff that makes me laugh
That Leap Year Thing
According to some legend or other, February 29 (tomorrow) is the date when women are “allowed” to propose marriage to men, as opposed to vice versa, which catastrophe may fall on any other day of the year.
So let’s play another one of Kim’s Silly Games.
Assuming you were of the age and (non-)marital status to be able to take advantage of said Leap Year foolishness, from which of the five options below would you entertain such a proposal? (And no, you can’t chicken out and nominate your current wife because that would be too easy.) To make life easier, you can rank said proposers if you want.
Another assumption (and this is a difficult one) is to imagine that none of the choices is batshit fucking crazy.
Here are the options available to you, O Lucky Man (and the names are linked, for any background you might need).
Rank away, in Comments.
News Roundup
And talking about giving the finger:
...let NYFC sink.
...they hate us, we move, Q.E.D.
From the Global Cooling Climate Warming Change© front:
and:
...make ’em starve, guys: join the Frogs and Krauts, make your own European Union. Also:
...some would call it prudence, others would call it hypocrisy. I report, you decide.
On the Police Blotter:
...wait [putting on Sarah Hoyt’s Shocked Face]: you mean criminals don’t obey gun-prohibition laws?
And speaking of gun laws:
...git ‘er done, cher.
...that’s not really breaking news, is it? We’ve been doing that anyway, since Trump was still only a millionaire.
In the Dept. of Vanishing Things:
...wait: could this crisis be from vegans becoming a dying breed? One can only hope.
And in International News:
...and as plans go, this sounds like a good one.
...lemme guess: for boys, Mohammed, Piotr and Jetmir; for girls, Ngxoza, Jasmin and Agnieszka.
...presenting Dr. Kim’s Patented Anti-Seagull Devi©e:
And now ’tis time for link-free 
...and how many men would take the risk?
...not, mind you, that I think she said (or says) it that often, the Welsh tart. But anyway:
And one from days of yore:
And that’s it for the news.
Quote Of The Day
I really could quit looking up things to feature here and just read Jeremy Clarkson for material. Here’s his latest:
OH no. It really is true. Just days after calling in the administrators, Body Shop has started to shut its branches across the country.
So where am I going to get my satsuma body butter now? And my carrot moisturiser? And my tea tree oil?
I guess I’ll have to go back to the olden days of using soap and water and accepting the fact that old people are supposed to look like scrotums.
Priceless.
I know, it’s actually scrota, but I’m not going to correct The Greatest Living Englishman.
Monday Funnies
Too gloomy? Try some of these, then:
…but then again:
#StupidBroad
But if we’re going to continue with that fantasy…
…whereas in reality:
And our final thought for the day:
News Roundup
...in those halcyon days before the Safety Nazis took over.
Let’s kick off with some Crime News:
...in which we play “guess the race of the bad guy”.
...nothing to do with all the rampant theft and looting, of course, it’s just pure racism in action. Bonus: guess in whose electoral district this is happening?
...good grief, why didn’t we think of that before? I bet his law prof is so proud of him.
...can somebody ‘splain to me why we shouldn’t inflict some cruel and unusual punishment on his murderous ass… oh yeah, that Constitution thing. Damn.
And in the Great Cultural Assimilation Project:
...I’d show some sympathy, but it’s NYFC.
...on the bright side, they might have done this to a Texan.
#ThanksTexGovAbbott
...sheesh, where do they think they are: Minneapolis?
...”racists” being just about every Irishman not in government.
In Medical News:
…
And also:
...and when you’ve lost Stephen Fry, you’ve pretty much lost the war.
And now, some Supernatural Sex News:
...just kidding: they really are fucking crazy [sic]. Pity the poor ghosts. And speaking of the insane:
...I’m just amazed that people are crazy enough to give money to FJB at all. On the other hand, it’s his last chance to have some cash lying around when his ass leaves the White House.
In this Friday’s (link-free) 
And in Sorta-ShowBiz News:
...frankly, I’ve seen curvier ironing-boards. But hey, judge for yourself:
…”stunning”? STUNNING?
Now here’s stunning:
...take it away, chica:
And on that truly stunning note, we end the news roundup.