Us Vs. Them

What women see:

“OMG, look how beautiful that sea is, and the islands are so romantic, and look! there’s a cruise ship out there, I wonder what the view’s like from the ship?”

What men see: 

…and don’t try to deny it.

Way To Go, Roger

I always liked this guy, as much for his ability as his quiet, classy sportsmanship.  And here’s further reason why I should:

Roger Federer has revealed that he refuses to sleep in a bed without his wife of almost a decade by his side.
The Swiss-born tennis ace, 37, who is widely considered the greatest male player of all time, admitted that his wife, children and friends come first, despite his passion for the sport.
In an interview with The Sunday Times, Federer explained that his wife, whom he married in 2009, and their two sets of twins, who are home-schooled, travel everywhere with him when he is on tour.

Gives new meaning to the term “family man”, doesn’t it?.  And yeah, his massive income makes that lifestyle possible.  Doesn’t mean I shouldn’t applaud him for doing the right thing.

Predictably, Ishmael has an even better (and funnier) take on Federer’s grace and class.

And just for a bonus:  some Federer magic.  Enjoy.

Standards, Double, Women For The Use Of

There’s this rather foul old aristocratic trot in Britishland who, at age 69, has declared that she has no interest in making whoopee with a man her own age, but would be quite willing to do the nasty with someone close to half that.

Granted, she was quite a looker in her heyday (around the time of the Normandy landings, that is):

…but alas, she is no fine French wine and has not aged well at all.  Like most once-beautiful women, she’s carried the arrogance of beauty way past its sell-by date and now she’s just pathetic.

I have to ask myself a few things:  firstly, what kind of 35-year-old man would even consider paging through the wrinkles to find her rather cobwebby Garden Of Delight;  secondly, what narcissism allows her to think that she could set that demand and have it fulfilled, and thirdly, why doesn’t she get called a “dirty old devil” as an old man most certainly would if he announced that he was only only interested in jumping a college coed?

Ah fuck it, I know the answers to all three questions, and they’re profoundly depressing.

Most depressing of all, though, is that the old harridan has no shame in announcing all this to the entire nation on TV.  One would hope that someone of her generation would have more manners, modesty or class, but I suppose that as the titled old bat has probably had more pricks than a pin cushion, she probably doesn’t care.

Fach.

Actually, the reason she wouldn’t bonk a man of her age is that most of us would see through her bullshit and decline the offer, whereas some younger fool would be taken in by her title, celebrity and whatever other reasons why young fools bonk someone of their Nana’s age.

In Other News, Dogs Chase Cats

I’ve never been involved in the movie business at all, so I’m not really qualified to comment on this story (not that this has ever stopped me before):

Alexa Chung has revealed how she was once ordered to strip by a movie producer while being auditioned for a role. In a worrying #MeToo moment, the model was told to remove her clothes so that the exec could see what she looked like naked.
Addressing the Oxford Union, Alexa said: ‘He told me to strip because he needed to see what I looked like naked for a scene that required it.’

Okay, let’s all accept the fact that the whole casting thing could just turn into an opportunity for men to catch a free look at naked women.  (In other news, Gen. Custer seems to be having some difficulties with the Sioux.)  And yeah yeah, that’s just awful and terrible etc. etc.

I have some parallel thoughts, however:  if you are auditioning for a part where you’re going to be filmed in the nude, don’t be shocked when you’re asked to show what you look like naked.  If you’re Julia Roberts, for example, you can turn down such demands because you’re going to get a body double anyway — they’re casting the face, not your ironing-board body.  But if you’re a nobody, you can’t really turn it down because appearing or performing in the nude is one of the reasons you’re being cast at all and if we’re going to be blunt about it, if you have some blemish (e.g. saggy boobs or a large birthmark), the producer is not going to hire a body double for a nobody.  

The other thought is that the director has to be sure that when he films a scene — any scene, let alone a nude one — he has to be sure that viewers concentrate on what he’s trying to show, not on the fact that Second Actress From The Left has one breast considerably larger than the other.

So while I can sympathize with this Alexa Chung (whoever she is) because of the voyeur thing, I can also see things from the other side of the desk, so to speak.  I should also point out that this woman is an ex-model, and didn’t seem to have too many qualms about being naked anyway:

And here’s another thought:  a producer asking to see what you look like on the nude is not a Harvey Weinstein/#MeToo moment;  a producer wanting you to fuck him to get the part, is.

We can also talk about why nude modelling or nude scenes in movies are necessary at all, but that’s a topic for another post.

I’ll Give You Backlash

Insty linked to this article a while back:

Will #MeToo Spark Backlash Against Women in the Workplace?

You’d better believe it, although not just in the ways that the [female] writer of the article thinks.  Here are my thoughts on the topic, and I’ll bet anything that I’m not alone in this.

If I were a company owner or senior manager, my first obligation would be to the company:  its performance, productivity and profitability (the Three Ps).  In order to further that agenda, these are the things I’d do.

  • I would never hire a woman again, unless I absolutely had to.  In the latter situation, I’d hire an older woman with lots of experience only if there was absolutely no male candidate for the job with the same skills.  (Why older?  Because young women are fucked up, and I’m not interested in helping them.  Younger women are also more likely to affect one or more of the Three Ps because of their attitude, their propensity to cause trouble in the office, their sense of entitlement, and all the other characteristics which would affect the company’s productivity e.g. months and months of pregnancy leave.)  But honestly, I would prefer to hire male workers almost exclusively so we could concentrate on getting the job done.
  • I would not hire a Human Resources manager, or have an HR department.  HR is most often a refuge for women in any case, it has no operational function within a company, is quite simply overhead, and in many cases, malevolent overhead because it has to justify its existence, and can only do so by screwing with the lives of the employees and being an organ whereby dissatisfaction can be aired.  Every single technical function of HR can be handled by competent line managers, and what can’t be, I’d outsource.
  • There would be no administrative assistants (“secretaries”, as we used to call them, another hive for women to inhabit).  In today’s world, I would expect every employee to handle their own admin as part of the job description.  What they can’t handle (e.g. business travel planning, which can get complicated), I’d outsource that as well.
  • If I were to hire a woman, she’d have either a STEM degree from a technical college or any degree from Hillsdale.  I would make it plain, as part of the interview, that the focus of her job was to be the business, and nothing else.  And yes:  she would have to have a track record at least twice as good as any male interviewee for the position.

If all this comes across as hard-ass or “discriminatory”, I don’t care because I didn’t create today’s toxic environment, where men are vilified just for being men, where unprovable accusations are accepted as fact, and where prickly sensitivities have to be protected by company policy instead of by manners and decency.   To be frank, I hate the feminization of the business world, and in my own small way I’d be pushing back against it.

Of course, I’m never going to work in an office, or for Global MegaCorp Inc. or for anyone other than as an at-will worker.  Nor will I ever hire anyone ever again.  But let me tell you all, do not be surprised if the “backlash against women in the workplace” manifests itself in any or all of the above bullet points, even in part.

Men didn’t start this bullshit;  but we sure as hell can do our part to end it.  What you sow, you reap in the end;  and women need to understand this, if nothing else.

Going All The Way

In our continuing saga of “Teachers Shagging Their Students”, we come to this guy in Florida — of course — who despite having a hottie wife, managed to tap not one but two underage female students concurrently.  The twist?  He ended the thing when each of the girls turned 18.  Needless to say, when the spurned [sic] Lolitas found out he’d been cheating on both of them, they decided, in typical catty teenage-girl fashion, to tell his wife (pictured below).

Proving once and for all that women just don’t have a sense of humor, Wifey tossed Hubby out of the house and then called the school principal to rat on him.

He’s headed for jail, of course, despite neither of the teenage totties wanting to press charges  — but I’ll be really surprised if he gets the token sentence that a female teacher in the same situation would have received.