In Other News, Dogs Chase Cats

I’ve never been involved in the movie business at all, so I’m not really qualified to comment on this story (not that this has ever stopped me before):

Alexa Chung has revealed how she was once ordered to strip by a movie producer while being auditioned for a role. In a worrying #MeToo moment, the model was told to remove her clothes so that the exec could see what she looked like naked.
Addressing the Oxford Union, Alexa said: ‘He told me to strip because he needed to see what I looked like naked for a scene that required it.’

Okay, let’s all accept the fact that the whole casting thing could just turn into an opportunity for men to catch a free look at naked women.  (In other news, Gen. Custer seems to be having some difficulties with the Sioux.)  And yeah yeah, that’s just awful and terrible etc. etc.

I have some parallel thoughts, however:  if you are auditioning for a part where you’re going to be filmed in the nude, don’t be shocked when you’re asked to show what you look like naked.  If you’re Julia Roberts, for example, you can turn down such demands because you’re going to get a body double anyway — they’re casting the face, not your ironing-board body.  But if you’re a nobody, you can’t really turn it down because appearing or performing in the nude is one of the reasons you’re being cast at all and if we’re going to be blunt about it, if you have some blemish (e.g. saggy boobs or a large birthmark), the producer is not going to hire a body double for a nobody.  

The other thought is that the director has to be sure that when he films a scene — any scene, let alone a nude one — he has to be sure that viewers concentrate on what he’s trying to show, not on the fact that Second Actress From The Left has one breast considerably larger than the other.

So while I can sympathize with this Alexa Chung (whoever she is) because of the voyeur thing, I can also see things from the other side of the desk, so to speak.  I should also point out that this woman is an ex-model, and didn’t seem to have too many qualms about being naked anyway:

And here’s another thought:  a producer asking to see what you look like on the nude is not a Harvey Weinstein/#MeToo moment;  a producer wanting you to fuck him to get the part, is.

We can also talk about why nude modelling or nude scenes in movies are necessary at all, but that’s a topic for another post.

I’ll Give You Backlash

Insty linked to this article a while back:

Will #MeToo Spark Backlash Against Women in the Workplace?

You’d better believe it, although not just in the ways that the [female] writer of the article thinks.  Here are my thoughts on the topic, and I’ll bet anything that I’m not alone in this.

If I were a company owner or senior manager, my first obligation would be to the company:  its performance, productivity and profitability (the Three Ps).  In order to further that agenda, these are the things I’d do.

  • I would never hire a woman again, unless I absolutely had to.  In the latter situation, I’d hire an older woman with lots of experience only if there was absolutely no male candidate for the job with the same skills.  (Why older?  Because young women are fucked up, and I’m not interested in helping them.  Younger women are also more likely to affect one or more of the Three Ps because of their attitude, their propensity to cause trouble in the office, their sense of entitlement, and all the other characteristics which would affect the company’s productivity e.g. months and months of pregnancy leave.)  But honestly, I would prefer to hire male workers almost exclusively so we could concentrate on getting the job done.
  • I would not hire a Human Resources manager, or have an HR department.  HR is most often a refuge for women in any case, it has no operational function within a company, is quite simply overhead, and in many cases, malevolent overhead because it has to justify its existence, and can only do so by screwing with the lives of the employees and being an organ whereby dissatisfaction can be aired.  Every single technical function of HR can be handled by competent line managers, and what can’t be, I’d outsource.
  • There would be no administrative assistants (“secretaries”, as we used to call them, another hive for women to inhabit).  In today’s world, I would expect every employee to handle their own admin as part of the job description.  What they can’t handle (e.g. business travel planning, which can get complicated), I’d outsource that as well.
  • If I were to hire a woman, she’d have either a STEM degree from a technical college or any degree from Hillsdale.  I would make it plain, as part of the interview, that the focus of her job was to be the business, and nothing else.  And yes:  she would have to have a track record at least twice as good as any male interviewee for the position.

If all this comes across as hard-ass or “discriminatory”, I don’t care because I didn’t create today’s toxic environment, where men are vilified just for being men, where unprovable accusations are accepted as fact, and where prickly sensitivities have to be protected by company policy instead of by manners and decency.   To be frank, I hate the feminization of the business world, and in my own small way I’d be pushing back against it.

Of course, I’m never going to work in an office, or for Global MegaCorp Inc. or for anyone other than as an at-will worker.  Nor will I ever hire anyone ever again.  But let me tell you all, do not be surprised if the “backlash against women in the workplace” manifests itself in any or all of the above bullet points, even in part.

Men didn’t start this bullshit;  but we sure as hell can do our part to end it.  What you sow, you reap in the end;  and women need to understand this, if nothing else.

Going All The Way

In our continuing saga of “Teachers Shagging Their Students”, we come to this guy in Florida — of course — who despite having a hottie wife, managed to tap not one but two underage female students concurrently.  The twist?  He ended the thing when each of the girls turned 18.  Needless to say, when the spurned [sic] Lolitas found out he’d been cheating on both of them, they decided, in typical catty teenage-girl fashion, to tell his wife (pictured below).

Proving once and for all that women just don’t have a sense of humor, Wifey tossed Hubby out of the house and then called the school principal to rat on him.

He’s headed for jail, of course, despite neither of the teenage totties wanting to press charges  — but I’ll be really surprised if he gets the token sentence that a female teacher in the same situation would have received.

Tapping The Ex

No man should.

And calling it “hate sex” doesn’t even come close to making it acceptable — rather, the reverse.

Of course, someone is going to suggest that if your ex happens to look like this, then it’s okay:

But I will remind everyone of the old saying:  “No matter how hot she is or how good she looks, there’s always at least one guy who’s sick of all her bullshit.”

Changes Up & Down

A couple of years ago, the Daily Mail featured this creature in their coverage of the races at Aintree (Liverpool):

I know;  no man should, right?  Well, apparently the young lady saw the pic of herself, came to the same conclusion and did something bout it.  The following year at Aintree produced this pic:

Yikes.  Were it not for the tattoos on the feet [sigh],  you wouldn’t know it was the same girl.  Again:

Alas, thanks to the current trend towards radical feminism (“Your body is beautiful no matter what it looks like!”), coupled with the usual suspects (booze, bad diet, etc.), American girls seem to be headed in the opposite direction.

Try not to throw up.

Sad, especially when you learn that all the changes took place inside the space of a couple of years.

But hey… it’s a free country, so to speak, and these women should be able to abuse themselves as they please — just as men can exercise their choice and not date them unless there’s drunkenness and/or sheer desperation involved.

Hidden Depths

Like many of my contemporaries — people who grew up in a British colony — my childhood literary upbringing was primarily that of the Mother Country:  Rudyard Kipling, Enid Blyton, Agatha Christie, C.S. Lewis and so on.

Another was a female author, E. (Edith) Nesbit, who wrote Victorian-era children’s classics such as The Railway Children and The Story Of The Treasure-Seekers.  As a child, I remember my parents reading both to me at bedtime.

One always thinks of the authors of children’s literature — especially female authors — as quiet, spinsterly or even virginal.  In the case of Edith Nesbit, it turns out, nothing could be further from the truth.

So far, Edith had been rather a passive participant in ‘free love’, but she now began to even the score with Hubert, embarking on a series of romantic affairs with young writers whom she mentored. Some of these relationships may have been platonic rather than passionate, such as her fling with George Bernard Shaw, who she met through the Fabian Society.

It’s likely her other lovers were less reserved.  The young poet Richard Le Gallienne was captivated by Edith’s beauty and unconventional style – she refused to wear a corset and cut her hair boyishly short, drifting around in flowing robes, her wrists jangling with bangles – and she contemplated leaving Hubert for him.
A young accountant, Noel Griffith, was the next to be dazzled by her, although he found her ménage à trois with Alice and Hubert bizarre, observing that Alice seemed uncomfortable and that Edith found Alice irritating.  The only real beneficiary was Hubert, who was ‘very hot-blooded’ and ‘abnormally sexual’ – which didn’t stop him moralising about the importance of fidelity in his newspaper columns.  Meanwhile, Edith let her children run wild, playing on the railway, and turned a blind eye to domestic chaos.

Sounds positively 21st-century, dunnit?