Whole Lotta Ifs

Stay with me on this one.

If I were many years younger, and if I were not married, and if I lived in Colorado;  and if this woman wasn’t already married, and if I happened to meet her, and if she wasn’t utterly repulsed by me to the point of shooting my fat ass — if all that, then I’d give her a big kiss on the cheek.

Which woman?  This one.

And I bet I’m not the only man who thinks this.

Old Times, Good Times

From Mr. Free Market comes this observation:

As I pointed out to him in my reply, it goes deeper than that.  In the old days, people used to leave their back doors open so the deliveryman could check the supplies of milk, butter and eggs in the fridge, and refill as needed.

I leave it to everyone’s imagination as to what would happen should such a service be reintroduced in Britishland today.  (Or, for that matter, in any urban center in the U.S.A.)

Going Out In Style

What more can be said about a bunch of Ole Pharts not only having sex in public, but a guy letting his 85-year-old wife pull the train?  (I’m guessing about the last part, but it wouldn’t surprise me, nowadays.)

And who knew that dogging had come to Connecticut (state motto:  “Like Massachusetts, only with less class and charm”)?

Goddamn Baby Boomers… couldn’t they just have had an orgy at Happy Hours Retirement Village, like all the others do?

Go Boris!

When I saw this sentence from BritPM Boris Johnson, my heart sank:

You can’t just arrest your way out of a problem.

Then he redeemed himself:

It certainly helps, but it is only part of the answer. You need to tackle all the causes and incentives that are encouraging the criminal mentality, and that means first of all exploding any sense that the law is weak, or that criminals can get away with it. When the police catch a violent criminal, it is vital they get the sentence they deserve.
At present, there are too many serious violent or sexual offenders who are coming out of prison long before they should.
In the past five years, we have seen literally hundreds of convicted rapists who have come out of prison commit another sexual offence. There are thousands of ‘super prolifics’ – criminals with more than 50 convictions to their name – who are being spared jail altogether.
This cannot go on. I am afraid that as a society we have no choice but to insist on tougher sentencing laws for serious sexual and violent offenders, and for those who carry knives.
Our first duty is to protect the public in the most basic way – and that means taking such people off the streets.

[pause to let the applause and cheering die down]

Of course, policies like “stop and search” are going to cause palpitations amongst the liberals and criminal-symps [lots of overlap], but the plain fact is that when the police can do their job — i.e. try to prevent crime before it happens — and the justice system is allowed to work — i.e. impose jail sentences that keep criminals off the streets — society as a whole improves.

Just ask the denizens of NYFC when Mayor Giuliani and Police Chief Bratton did just that, back in the late 1990s and early 2000s.  And if it made it worked there, it can make it work anywhere.

And to let the BritPM have the last word:

Yes, in the short term it will mean more pressure on our jails, and that is why today I am also announcing that we are creating another 10,000 spaces in our prisons. The Chancellor, Sajid Javid, has agreed to invest up to £2.5 billion to deliver this commitment.

Get going, Boris.

Enter Boris

I’ve always liked Boris Johnson — yeah, maybe it’s the Old Boy thing (Eton College was the “brother” school to St. John’s) — but what I like most of all is the predictable way the U.K. Left has responded to his accession to Number 10 Downing Street:

 

Just note that underneath Johnson’s jovial, stammering, Hooray-Henry exterior, there’s some serious intellect going on.  (See here where he talks about Winston Churchill’s oratory.)  In other words, he’s the complete opposite of ex-U.S. President (Half-)Black Jesus, underneath whose smooth and urbane exterior… not much was going on.

And if PM Boris can’t get Britishland out of the horrible European Union, the Brits deserve to get everything that happens to them.

Go Boris!