Heart Attacks

Apparently, the owner of this house suffered several heart attacks during its construction.  When I saw the pics, I nearly had a couple too, albeit for different reasons.

From the article:

Milkman-turned-builder and artist Barry Surtees began his vision for the glass palace in 2007.

Actually, it looks like something a one-time milkman might have built. As an art gallery, it might have been okay, albeit still high up on a Hillary-Clinton-Industrial-Strength Ugly scale.  As an actual house to live in?  Heart attack material.  It reinforces my hatred of All Things Modern more than does Lady Gaga or rap music .

I think I’m going to need an extra shot of gin with my breakfast today.

12 comments

  1. $3.4mil doesn’t buy as much as it used to.
    You know what they say, “When a person pretends to be his own architect he has a fool for a client.”

  2. I’m well aware my tastes in architecture don’t match those of most people; I tend toward the simple and efficient. That said, and I’m sure my opinion would change were I to have the opportunity to walk through it, I don’t find all of those pictures off-putting (pictures, no matter how well composed and “artsy” rarely convey the true “feel” of spaces). A couple of the rooms seem acceptable, but the whole thing reeks of “inconvenient modernistic fishbowlitis” (as does the house used in Amazon’s Bosch TV series).

    I don’t think I’d suffer a heart attack as consequence, but then again, I’d terminate the architect’s services somewhere around the first set of 3-D sketches, well before any contract was let or the first spadeful of dirt got turned.

    1. Having been in a number of homes in the Hollywood Hills, the “Bosch” house is typical of what was built in the late mid-century where “the view” was everything.

  3. They keep saying “curved windows,” when they’re obviously “straight windows laid out on a rough curve.”

    I wouldn’t mind having a top floor with massive windows for an observation deck, but I’d rather have actual walls in the lower floors. Much more comfortable in winter and summer.

  4. Gag. If there is no tongue-and-grove knotty pine, count me out. And a natural stone fireplace with hearth and mantel.

  5. Where are the parapets and the firing slits? Drawbridge? Portcullis? Moat? Don’t even get me started on murder holes and boiling oil channels. When they told me that “A man’s home is his castle” I took it very literally.

  6. The milkman-cum-designer bragged “….follow the natural contours of the surroundings.”
    Bullshit! I’ve never seen a sharp edged, sharp cornered, don’t touch me lines and clashing faces sticking out like that POS anywhere in nature, least of all in the English countryside.
    Like most modern architects, his idea of design is like a hold-my-beer-watch-this brag where he does his best to offend the senses so he gets noticed.
    What an asshole.
    I’ll bet his music is offensive to the ears too.

  7. I kinda like the indoor pool, but the wife and I are in our 50s, and while we look a BIT better than most of our cohort there’s no way she’s going to go for floor to ceiling windows in most of the house…

    1. Sorry, that’s just too much house to care for. Although, if you’ve got the money to buy it you’ve got the money to hire staff to keep it up.

    2. While interesting and pleasing in may aspects, especially materials and craftsmanship, I suspect it’s a big echo chamber and a bottomless maintenance money pit.
      Spiral stairways are dangerous, especially for seniors as are the curved steps with varying tread width.
      No thanks; I’d rather have this place, which sold for $10-11 million.
      https://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=sagee+manor&&view=detail&mid=D28486B086D20008974DD28486B086D20008974D&&FORM=VRDGAR&ru=%2Fvideos%2Fsearch%3Fq%3Dsagee%2Bmanor%26FORM%3DHDRSC3

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