Fat Ass

I haven’t ever understood the fascination with a fat ass on a woman.  I know the anthropological reasons in primitive societies — where a wife’s ass was an indicator of her husband’s success, i.e. the better he fed her, the better provider he was — but I never understood the fascination for lard-assed women in the civilized world, and nor do these guys.

I know, I know:  this post is useless without some kind of pictorial underpinning. [sigh]

…and that’s one of the least offensive examples out there.  A single trip to WalMart… well, you know the rest.  (No such pic posted, on humanitarian grounds.)  And in any event, I speak not of the genus walmarta  — those women who become pear-shaped either through diet, childbirth or unfortunate genetic background;  I speak here of those vain modern women who have fat or worse injected into their posteriors to plump them out deliberately.

Anecdotally, a Black (female) friend once told me that Black women have fat asses as a protection against their male counterparts’ predilection for anal sex:  “It keeps them further back” — but I don’t buy that, unless that’s the primal cause for Black men to have larger-than-average dicks, I dunno.  Maybe, in the case of the Kardashian coven, the butt enlargements are simply done as an attractant for their favorite choice of partner (i.e. wealthy Black men).

Whatever.

What I do know is that this female trend towards buttock-amplification is pretty moronic, even when matched against female stupidity such as spending untold dollars on crap like anti-aging creams and potions (none of which work).

And I, for one, am not a huge fan thereof.  In fact, were it not for her superstructure, I’d find Carol Vorderman quite unappealing.

But hey, as the man said:  “A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of small minds.”

Within the bell curve, however, something that would occur more towards the middle — such as that as shown by Diogenes in his weekly series — is far more appealing:

What I also find unattractive, by the way, are those who inhabit the left-hand  side of the same bell curve:  the snake-hipped, flat-buttocked women of the runway model kind (which may also explain my disdain for the average Chinese or Japanese woman, few of whom seem to have any buttocks at all).

As with all things, sufficiency  is what we strive for.

Except when it comes to boobage.  Even I have my limits.

6 comments

  1. Personally I like a rounded set of buttocks, I blame it on spending my formative years in a place where most of the girls were of Italian or Hispanic origin (demographics that naturally tend toward hourglass shapes, and I married a full-blooded Italian). I’d even find the much-loathed Kim K attractive IF she’d come by her shape naturally instead of surgically. (And I DID once see her doing jumping-jacks while channel surfing, all I can say is DAYAM, it’s amazing she didn’t blacken both eyes).

    There IS a difference between curvy and fat though. 38-26-36 is curvy. 38-44-36 is fat. The latter is what’s generally seen at Walmart.

  2. They make the rockin’ world go round.

    At least that’s what I hear.

    Also, Sir Mix-A-Lot says they’re great – and he CANNOT lie.

  3. After spending the weekend at a middle eastern / oriental dance festival with my wife and dance instructing mother in law, I can say “NEVER AGAIN!”. From the scrawny white Biafrans to the Wally World whales and every deformity in between, I’ve seen enough for a lifetime.

    On top of that, my wife made and altered foundation garments for “special needs people”. (birth defects, scoliosis, surgical adventures and misadventures, etc.) The vast majority do not meet the standards portrayed by Greek sculpture.

    I don’t care what someone else does, but just keep it under wraps…

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