News Roundup

1)  British holidaymaker, 71, is shot dead on tourist paradise of Turks and Caicos as robbers burst into house to steal cash and jewellery —  fake news;  private citizens are banned from owning guns in T&C, so this couldn’t possibly have happened.

2)  British vegan activist is covered in blood when ‘farmers chase her down a motorway and shoot through her car window after she freed 16 of their rabbits’ —  looks like the Spanish farmers need more range time.

3)  ISIS strap suicide vests to COWS and blow the animals up in attack that failed to kill any humans in Iraq —  that’s the end of ISIS:  now they’ve pissed off PETA.  (Funny how there aren’t any “militant vegan activists” in Iraq…)

4)  Hundreds of illegal guns flood city after gun ban —  let’s hear it for “Australian-style” gun control.

5)  Women marry men for money — and if there aren’t men rich enough, they don’t marry at all.   Another big surprise.

6)  Bonk more, and life feels better —  another shocker, brought to you by !Science!

7)  Mugabe dies —  about time, and about forty years too late.  Africa wins again.

6 comments

  1. I thought such a thing was impossible but Oz media is more clueless than US media. They make a big deal about AKs but the first picture has two ARs, two pistol caliber carbines and two pistols. The second picture has a pistol, an air rifle, something I can’t identify but looks like a disassembled rifle with a stock and two very long barrels, something with a mag well but a wood stock and a long barrel, a bolt gun and other stuff I can’t see enough detail on but nothing appears to be an AR or AK.

  2. Your most kaffir dudeness, you missed the gauchos assisting the exit from the arena of the vegan dirtbags attempting to trash their rodeo in Argentina. I’m told bullwhips were used, YEAH! When they (the gauchos) had succeeded in their endeavor the audience cheered and applauded. It’s a pity, Argentina could have been Texas, South, but then the Perons happened.

  3. Whenever anybody starts a conversation about gun control with “In Australia…” our Pavlovian response should be “Fuck Australia. Next…”

    And Re: Mugabe. The good they die young, don’t they?

  4. The report is from “The Age” newspaper. Our equivalent of The New York Times.
    The photo of the crim tells a thousand words. Some dingbat politicians told us to feel sorry for the Somalians etc, and hence an influx of refugees. And then the bleeding heart types tell us to have some understanding and compassion for ‘displaced families’. But until recently there was no mention of the background of the crims – then security camera footage gave the game away.
    You do not need many bad apples to spoil a city.

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