(Note to my Lady Readers: I accept no responsibility if you do any of the following.)
Ranked in ascending order of coldness:
- Arrange a “break-up dinner” at a restaurant, and split his head open with a cleaver when he starts whining and protesting
- Invite him over so that he arrives while you’re in bed with the New Guy (and bonus points if it’s his apartment that you’re sharing)
- Tell him you’ve finally decided to have a threesome, only it will be with Roger and Dave, and he’s not invited
- Send him a nude selfie from your hotel room in Jamaica, said selfie to include the equally-naked (and fully erect) Jamaican pool “boy” in the background
- Get your mother to give him the bad news. (Bonus points if she’s always hated him.)
Your suggestions in Comments.